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If every player controls a creature when the ability resolves, the ability wont do anything
Then, of course, you'll get a couple other goodies, like a spindown life counter to keep track of your life total
4/4 Illustrated by Ben Hill Standard Not Legal Alchemy Not Legal Pioneer Not Legal Historic Legal Modern Not Legal Brawl Legal Legacy Legal Comp
The companion ability has no effect if the card isn't revealed as your companion at the start of the game, and it creates no restrictions on putting a card with a companion ability into your starting deck
It's a really expensive enchantment, but it does have Convoke to reduce the cost